Perspectives and Expectations
by MarvelFanFicUniverse
Summary: Peter Parker contemplates how he got to this point in his life. Where does he go from here? Set after "Captain America: Civil War."
**A/N: So, this is the first thing I've written in years, and this piece here is more of a test-run than anything. I'm really just trying to get back into the swing of things and dust off some of my old skills. Feel free to leave any and all feedback after you read this.**

 **To give context, this takes place in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and it's in between Civil War and the upcoming Spidey film. It's just Peter's internal perspective on everything that went down, and it's also a bit of a look into his regular life. None of this should be taken as canon.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own Spider-Man or any other Marvel characters or events mentioned. All rights belong to Marvel Studios and Sony Pictures Entertainment.**

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 _Queens, New York: A young teen named Peter Parker sits idly in his bedroom, pondering the circumstances and significance of his recent affairs._

Man, life is an interesting thing.

I mean, one minute I'm just me, normal kid Peter Parker, and then all of a sudden…Wham! Some spider comes out of nowhere, bites me right on the hand, and all of a sudden everything's different. I can stick to walls, and I'm super strong. I can move really fast, and I have this weird tingling in the back of my head that I still can't figure out. It's like a warning buzz, but I don't really hear or see anything. I just sort of…know what's around me.

Even with all of the crazy powers though, it's how my life has changed that's really made things weird. My Uncle Ben…god do I miss him. It's my fault, too. He's dead because of me. He's dead because I didn't do what he raised me to do. He always told me that I should stand up for what's right, and that I should never ever sit on the sidelines. He always used to talk about power and responsibility, and how we all had to do our part to help each other out. Just when he needed me the most…I let him down. It's all because I let that stupid burglar go past me. I could've stopped him, hell there were probably ten different ways I could've stopped him, but I didn't.

Now it's just me and May. She's always been like a Mom to me. I never knew my real parents, but Aunt May is definitely a woman for the ages. She's the best woman I've ever known, and she and Uncle Ben worked their butts off raising me like I was their own. I owe her all the world, and I hope that someday I can repay it. After Uncle Ben died, we moved out of our house in the suburbs and into our apartment. Neither one of us really wanted to stay there, and plus it was getting hard to pay the mortgage and everything with only Aunt May able to work. I've been trying to get jobs and all, but May doesn't want me to do anything except focus on school. I wish I could help her more, I really do.

I've been trying to live up to Uncle Ben's message by being Spider-Man, but I never expected anything like what has happened. Being a hero is so much tougher than it looks, and all the bad stuff happens at the worst possible time. I can't even count how many times I've had to leave hanging out with MJ or Harry to go off and stop a robbery or a car chase or whatever. I really want to be with my friends and have fun, but I can't just ignore a situation like that. I can't.

It doesn't help that my friends are getting worried about me, MJ especially. She and I have been close since we were 4 years old, and she's always had my back. Whenever Flash or Kong pick on me at school, MJ is always there to set them straight. I guess she just has that effect on people where she can get what she wants, and I'm not about to argue with it. I'm lucky to have her as a friend, but I've always looked at her as more than that. I'm not going to lie…I love her. She's sweet, beautiful, strong, smart, and the list just keeps going. I've never told her how I really feel. I'm afraid that she'll just hate me for it, because let's face it, I'm not the kind of guy most girls want.

It's all so crazy, and I just don't know where to go from here. I mean, my life's been extra levels of screwed up ever since I went and dealt with the Avengers. Yeah, I dealt with the freaking AVENGERS! I come home from school one day, walk into my apartment, and all of a sudden I see Tony Stark sitting on the couch with my Aunt. He ends up dragging me to Germany to go and fight Captain America, and that was just…I don't even know. I mean, it was awesome because I've always kind of looked up to Mr. Stark. I'm a computer geek, and he's like the ultimate computer geek. At the same time, I just didn't know how to deal with it all. I mean, I didn't really want to hurt Cap. Like, he's Captain America, and he's a hero. The guy has saved the world however many times over, and he's an icon. He and Mr. Stark were fighting over some government regulation thing…I don't know, and to be honest I didn't really care. I just wanted to impress Mr. Stark, and I hope that I did.

I don't know what I'm doing, but all I know is that I have to keep going. I have to be Spider-Man, not just for Uncle Ben, but for everyone out there who needs me. I have to look out for the little guy. At the same time, I have to be Peter Parker, and I have to take care of my Aunt. She tries her best to take care of me, and I have to look after her.

Man, this is going to be one hell of a ride.

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 **A/N: Well, that's it. I appreciate everyone who took the time to read this. Please leave your reviews and feedback, because it will truly help me figure out what I need to improve. Thanks so much!**


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